Hey ya'll, this has to be discussed! Ah, the age-old mystery of why guys just can't seem to grasp the obvious signs when a woman is not into them. It's like they need a neon sign flashing "She's just not that into you" right in their face! Women do not want to be mean but when we are just nice... most men take it as "She Loves me". Well, fear not, because today we're diving deep into this comical conundrum to uncover the zany reasons behind this puzzling phenomenon!
The Invisible Neon Sign
Imagine this: you're at a party, doing the classic 'looking around but not really looking' move, trying to dodge any potential unwanted attention like a ninja. But somehow, Guy #37 in the room still manages to miss your eye rolls, exaggerated yawns, and desperate glances towards the exit. It's like you're holding an invisible neon sign that says, "Please, for the love of all that is holy, do not approach!" Women will be direct with you when they like you, girls will play all day. Does she make space or time for you? Does she buy or make you things in your absence? She calls you or texts you consistently? Is she fake laughing or does she truly think your funny? When a woman questions you about random things or asks your opinion... She likes you. If she is trying to hook you up with her friend, itit's no-go. Some men are blinded by their confidence with women, she respects you... but she doesnt want to date you. Over stepping will have you friend zoned.
Selective Hearing
Guys seem to have a superpower when it comes to tuning out anything that doesn't align with their desired reality. You could be dropping hints louder than a marching band, but all they hear is the sweet sound of their own delusions. "She laughed at my joke... she must be head over heels!" Oh, buddy, if only laughter equated to love, comedy shows would be the new Tinder. I'm single but I do not want to date at the moment... please, do not try to have a fake me out date. She is not interested. We are good friends, I don't want to change that... that means " Nah, we good as friends only... chill". Women have their phones alllllll day... if you keep texting and she takes hours or days to respond... she doesnt like you. Same with men... ya'll ain't slick. Do not linger around hoping that one day she gets really horny and gives you a chance. You're giving predator vibes... yuck.
The Optimism Overload
Bless their optimistic hearts, but some guys have hope sprouting out of them like wildflowers in spring. So, when a woman politely declines an invitation with an excuse akin to "I'm washing my hair," they take it as a rain check for an actual hair-washing date. Little do they know, you're just binge-watching your favorite '90s sitcom for the fifth time in a row. I am 37, if I like a man and want more, I will be direct. There is no need for cat & mouse; whats good?!? As a mom its a bit more strict about who qualifies, but all women know quickly if you have a chance. Stop over thinking it and ask a woman directly so you won't feel foolish later. Also women that really like you do not need you to cash app them money first or pay their bills before y'all are even anything. A lot of men would rather buy the attention of a woman rather than earn it and that is an ingredient for a disaster.
Feedback Loop Failure
It's like they're stuck in a feedback loop with a glitchy Chan-bot – input given, output completely unrelated. Stop talking in emojis, I hate regular Good Morning texts, add something more to it. Let women tell you how the date was, or if it was nice seeing you yesterday. Let women text you or invite you sometimes. Also, ask her close friend if she likes you for-real or not... most will tell you straight up. You might think you're speaking English, but all they're hearing is a remix of "She's Just Not That Into You" using only Morse code beeps. In their defense, maybe they misplaced their decoder ring in the wash?
Attention Blindness Disorder
Just when you thought you've mastered the art of eye-rolling so hard it could power a wind turbine, guys throw in a curveball with their impeccable attention blindness disorder. A lot of men talk about sex too early in a conversation with women and it is such a turn off. The last thing you want to be labeled as in a group chat with women is a weirdo. Whether it's the lively podcast playing in the background or the distraction of a particularly entertaining squirrel outside the window, they manage to miss every "not interested" semaphore you're sending their way.
The She Doesn't Mean What She Says Paradox
One of the most baffling mysteries of the dating world – the paradox of "She doesn't mean what she says." You could spell it out in giant neon letters, accompanied by a marching band playing your breakup song, and they would still find a way to twist your words into a romantic sonnet. It's like they took a crash course in Creative Interpretation 101.
The Mixed Signals
In this wild world of mixed signals, misunderstood cues, and spectacularly failed attempts at reading the room, it's easy to see why guys struggle to pick up on a woman not being interested. Men also need to learn when a woman is using you when she's bored, when she needs money, when she just wants to see if she could use a man versus if she really just respects you. When people want each other, they're not confused about each other's once. I think a lot of people make liking someone and a person liking them more confusing than it needs to be. So stop being afraid of honesty and a response and just be direct. From selective hearing to optimism overload, it's a rollercoaster of comedic errors that keeps us all entertained.
So, the next time you find yourself face-to-face with a guy who's clearly in his own rom-com fantasy, just remember – it's not you, it's their hilarious inability to decode the most obvious of signals. Cue the laugh track, grab your popcorn, and enjoy the show!
Now, if you'll excuse me, I have podcasts to edit and workouts to do.
PS: If you're a guy reading this, take notes. The signs are there – you just need to channel your inner Chan... or maybe just ask her directly.
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